Bullying, Like it or not we need this

When I was a child growing up there were always bullies.  I don’t mean the hitting and steal your lunch kind but there is always a mean girl just waiting to make you look like a dick in front of others so they can build their own self esteem, create a group around them that make them more popular or give them power in the playground.  And I thank those people.  They made me more determined to succeed, more able to communicate, and identified all the qualities in a person that I didn’t want to associate with (I wonder how they are going for work these days).

The truth is that Bullying is a natural part of growth and a life stage.  What happens if we create this ideal world where no one says anything hurtful to another person so they go through their entire school years with everything smelling of roses, never getting to experience a knockback, never getting feedback they don’t like and never knowing that uncomfortable feeling of being outside your comfort zone?  We will have unemployable kids because these things all occur in the workforce and in real life.  There are no participation awards out here so the sooner they are taught coping mechanisms the better society will become.  Now I am not talking about these scum bags that tell kids to go kill themselves – who does that and what sort of a life do they live to be even saying such things. That is a problem far bigger than bullying I believe, but I am talking about the general day to day of ‘you can’t play with me, you don’t dress right, your don’t have the right hair, you aren’t popular like we are and the “exclusion bullying”’ – I have heard them all, and trust me it comes back when you are older and you have a daughter.  We will not ever totally eradicate bullying so what we do need to do is educate on the power of words and the need for respect and how to feel enough self love to not be overwhelmed by it.  It is also a time for us as parents to teach our children how to deal with these life events, setbacks, criticism and fairness because when they are grown and know everything they will not seek our help and this is where it gets out of hand.

While I feel the despair for all those parents that have lost children as a result of bullying I feel as a society we need to identify this will always exist and is an opportunity to educate and as our world evolves we will have less control over what our children are consuming and being exposed to so bring it back to basics, spend time setting a great example and teaching our children what it is to be resilient and strong.